Author: Mel Douleur
Fearless

I wish we could swim in a pool of my words,
Warm and comforted by the heart of my creations,
And then you would drown in their meaning.
I wish we could dine on beautiful, expensive china,
Drinking our feelings like wine out of the finest crystal,
And then you would choke on the poison of my spirit.
I wish we could snuggle on the softest blankets,
Revelling in the exquisite grace of our connection,
And then you would suffocate under the weight of your dereliction.
I wish I could sit in your lap, and you could embrace me,
Inhaling the magic you so easily brought out of me,
And then you would choke on the staleness that you’ve left me with.
I wish I could kiss you, just one kiss,
Before slicing you open to bleed at my feet,
Then I could dip my fingers in your wickedness
And rub it into my deliciously, desperate skin.
I hate you.
I love to hate you.
It is a beautiful hate.
Because it makes me fearless.
—
Hasty’s 31 Days of Horror link up… because I just can’t get enough!
The Dark and Light
“Do you see that spot, that place where the clouds touch the sun?”
“Yes, sweet girl… It’s beautiful.”
“Do you think that is where heaven is?”
“I don’t think heaven has quite such a fixed position.”
“I used to believe things about heaven… about who I might meet there one day.”
“Used to? You don’t anymore?”
“I don’t know. I think my idea of what heaven is has changed.”
“Tell me, little one.”
“Maybe heaven isn’t in the clouds, all white and comfortable… perhaps it’s really in the sun, where our spirits might feed the glow and light up the earth. Maybe heaven is really about fulfilling our destiny, ending our existence with something magical…”
“So, you don’t believe you’ll see your family again? Or friends? Or the loves of your life?”
“Not with my eyes, they are part of my body. I won’t hear them or touch them or get to kiss them…”
“That is sad, baby.”
“No, it is real. The human spirit has so much potential, I can’t imagine wasting it sitting around on clouds all day.”
“You have grown. Such strong ideas. But, what of God? Have you lost your faith?”
“God wouldn’t want us to be trapped within the limitations of our relationships. I think my idea takes Him into account more than yours.”
“Perhaps… Who can say?”
“Not you.”
“No. Not me.”
“I will be a solar flare. My spirit will burn hotter and brighter than many others, and I will be felt in our very atmosphere. My light will shine further than you could even imagine. A spark of magic that will not go unnoticed.”
“And what of me?”
“…Darkness is powerful, too.”
“But not as powerful as light, pretty girl. The dark will always be overtaken by the light.”
Our song

My broken breaths meet your warm, hungry tongue, while your fingers compose a sensual song on my skin.
My body is not my own, but I turn away, and you’re response is swift and determined.
Your hand on my throat, a growl inside yours, your body is now the conductor of our song.
Lost in sighs, the crescendo builds, my music vibrating against yours in perfect disharmony.
My heart races as our flesh mingles and my pleasure is taken by your melodic force.
My back arches to receive even more of you, as you pound out each luxurious note.
My breasts heave against the beat and you work to wrangle and coerce them.
My lips tremble and seek direction by yours, which deny me, but employ your teeth for the job.
My thighs part and hips rise, as your tempo stretches my patience and will.
My voice joins the chorus in whispered pleas and whimpered defeat when you deny the refrain with your own lyric.
You play your symphony across my skin and deep inside my favourite instrument until I’m sure the song will destroy me.
And just then, the perfect melody explodes between us under your skillful mastery.
Oh play me, my love, your own, delicious creation, play me over and over and over.
Until you tire of our song, which you promise is unlikely, because I am the sweetest music you have ever heard.
Holding me
With your arms wrapped around me,
Can you feel how you’re holding me together?
Far from a simple embrace,
You are stitching me and mending me
With your love.
With each squeeze,
You pick up the pieces that have fallen.
With each kiss on my neck,
You work the puzzle into place.
With each breath at my ear,
You seek out the missing parts.
And with every whispered word,
You glue me back together,
You fill the tiny gaps,
You sand me and smooth me,
To perfection.
Will you keep holding me,
And help me when the cracks
Reappear?
Will you be strong enough,
To hold on for both of us
Without fear?
Will you use your love,
To balance my will and your pace
Through my tears?
Please
Hold onto me
Into eternity.
As long as you are holding me,
I know that I won’t ever
Fall apart.
And as you keep me together,
I promise…
I’ll be holding you, too.
Purple Hope
Darkness gives way
The Sun bubbles up
Across a new day horizon
Light seeps into the clouds
Over leaves speckled with Autumn
And into my tired and hungry soul
As the black fades
The gray mist of yesterday
Is replaced by purple hope
The hole in my chest
Left from that wicked darkness
Seems to fill up with that Sun
Do you feel it too?
The warmth of my Sun?
Fire and freedom United?
She feeds me and fuels me
Waking my spirit
With the delight of that purple hope
So I bask in her beauty
I revel in the change
Created by something so simple
My sunrise
My saviour
My infinite purple hope

Screams of Eternity
In honor of Hasty’s 31 days of Horror and Halloween.
Strangled whimpers wafted through the tiny space, while his heavy breath puffed out into the chilled October air, a visible cloud of evil with each decisive movement. Each winding of his rope, each tie of a knot, each jerk of her body to position it perfectly… painfully, but perfectly.
As he completed the task, he admired his work. The tight bindings had her naked body twisted and secured in such a way that she looked as though something might break at any moment. The shape created by her stretched and twisted limbs was truly satisfying. His sadistic chuckle brought about another muffled whimper, as she couldn’t quite make any other sound.
Sorting through his tool bag, he glanced at her from time to time, soaking in the fear from her eyes. He turned toward her with a knife, a simple switch blade, but sharp and perfect for poking and prodding the other, lovely sounds of despair that he was desperate to enjoy, from his deliciously beautiful, new victim.
Her sweet eyes grew wide when she saw the blade, and her whimpers turned to attempts at muffled screams, strained by the belt around her neck. As he stepped against her, he pulled at her shoulder twisting her frame further to tighten the stranglehold, halting her pleas. Not that she could be understood anyway, through the old work rag he’d stuffed in her mouth while she was unconscious.
It was clear she would be a screamer, and his mind burned with anticipation. Hearing her cries when he captured her, was enough to set his body ablaze, and he almost hated silencing her when he knocked her out so he could strip and gag her without a fight. But the thought of her tormented shouts filling the small confines of his camper as he marked up her flawless body was nearly pure ecstasy.
However, the screams would have to wait until he tired of her aching whimpers. He contemplated cutting her free and letting her run, so he could capture her once again. Watching her run naked through the trees, scraping herself into a bloody mess would be awfully exciting. Chasing her down again and dragging her back to his torture chamber after that… Well, that would be exquisite.
As he pressed the blade against the sensitive skin above her collarbone, her tears began to fall, sliding over her cheeks and spilling onto her heaving chest where they collected into rivers that turned upside down as they dribbled from the points of her perfect nipples to the filthy floor below.
Wasted tears, he smirked. Beautiful wasted tears. And as he drew the blade across the ropes he’d just tied, the hope that sprung to her eyes was precious. Yes, he would set her free to be captured once again, because the defeat in her expression later would be perfection.
As he sliced through the bondage, she began to fight again, and he loved her for it. Her will and her strength fed something deep within. His ability to overpower her had made him high and he wanted to feel it, again and again.
He almost told her to be still. He almost explained his intentions, but he knew that his silence would be far more frightening than anything else. As her arm was freed, she clawed and struck him, before pulling at the belt around her neck and grabbing the cloth from her pretty mouth. She gasped, deeply to fill her lungs with oxygen, but the stale air inside the camper provided little relief.
She got in a couple good hits and scratches before he slapped her across the face to settle her. She stared, stunned, as he continued to cut loose the ropes that had held her in such exquisite chaos. When he removed the last rope from her ankle, she kicked him and ran, tumbling over herself down the steps beyond the door and screaming wildly.
He laughed, watching her stagger back to her feet and attempt to run through the leaves and fallen branches that surrounded the RV. She tripped several times, and he realized she would not be difficult to track, so he took his time coiling his leftover rope, and donning his backpack of tools.
Setting out after her, he picked up her trail quickly, she had left plenty of evidence of her trajectory. He quickly gained on her and could hear her pained steps and broken breaths. When he realized she’d gone in a circle, he nearly couldn’t stop himself from shouting at her for making it too easy.
But then, just before the clearing that housed his camper, he lost her trail. He searched the tree line to see where she’d re-entered the woods, but found no trace at all. The sun was setting though, and he thought about his night vision camera and his knowledge of his beloved woods. So he relaxed, realizing she just might be easier to track at night.
As he made his way back up the clearing to the rusted and neglected old vehicle, he smiled smugly at himself. This hunt had been incredible. This girl had been even more exciting than the last. This would be a kill he would watch again and again, bringing himself to ecstasy.
And he laughed again as he climbed the steps, planning the hours of blissful torture ahead of him.
When he opened the door, he was startled by her standing there. Oh, she thought she was smart, seeking shelter in the place he shouldn’t have thought to look.
But then, her own smug smile eroded her beautiful face. And he saw it, just before she plunged a massive old kitchen knife deep into his chest.
He stared at it, and the blood that oozed from his shirt. He could taste it, in his mouth and smell the acrid stench of his life essence pouring out of him. Suddenly, the pain was excruciating. He’d never expected this, which made it hurt so much worse.
He looked up and her eyes were wild, there was no longer any fear, just hatred and venom. She pulled the knife out with some force causing the pain to surge, and he lunged for her. She thrust the knife into his abdomen this time, and he felt it tear into his organs and slice down as she held it firmly. He screamed and wretched and gazed, pleadingly at his would be prey turned skilled hunter.
As he fell to the floor, tears searing his eyes, he heard HER laughing. He writhed with the agony he’d wished to inflict on her and felt his life beginning to fade. He looked up at her again and she became quiet.
“You never anticipated that I’d be stronger than you.” Her voice was beautiful, which he hadn’t expected, and he wished he’d given her the chance to plead for her life earlier. Perhaps things would’ve ended differently.
“Who can say?” She whispered, as if reading his mind. As he stared up into the face of this damsel who he had misjudged, he suddenly became aware of the presence of others. Spirits of those who’d gone before her surrounded him as his life gurgled away, drowning in his own blood.
He realized what was about to happen. He clumsily reached out for her ankle, clinging to this little girl who had somehow ended him. “Help me…”
But all he heard in response were the screams of his own tortured soul as his victims enjoyed their just spoils.
Screams that can sometimes still be heard, in that clearing, deep in his beloved woods.
Screams that will last for all of eternity.
Into the dark
Cold that seeps
Deep into your bones
Silence that boils
Right through your marrow
Darkness that invades
And bleeds you dry.
So why?
Why did you follow?
You knew what
The blackness brings.
You knew how
It would infect your mind.
You knew that
You’d never be free.
So why?
Why did you follow?
I know, little girl
I already understand.
But I need you to tell me
You need to say
Those words that
Will probably be your last.
So why?
Why did you follow?
That’s right…
Go on and tell.
Let your exhausted mind
Allow your body to rest.
You know the truth
Even if your soul is spared…
So why?
Why did you follow me
Into the dark?
Because your bones
Sweet Girl
Belong to me…
My first submission for the The Reverie Journal… For the prompt Bones.
Don’t be scared… it’s just October!
Love
It’s not the feeling you get when you connect with someone and experience that complete euphoria that comes from the chemical reaction in your body around that person.
That’s infatuation.
It’s not the tightness in your chest when you are away from that person and have the constant urge to talk to, text or see them.
That’s obsession.
It’s not the desire to climb inside someone’s mind and know everything about them, all their stories, all their hurt, and all their joy.
That’s fascination.
It’s not the heat of desire that leaves you burning for them every second of every day, and ties you into messy knots when those urges go unsatisfied.
That’s passion.
It’s not the need to complete another person, become part of their world and entwine yourself in their life so tightly that you sometimes don’t see where they stop and you start.
That’s captivation.
It’s not the moments wasted when the chemicals dissipate, the urges wane, the knowledge is complete, the fire burns out and the relationship you share becomes dry, brittle and hollow.
That’s life.
It’s not making food, or cleaning the house, or changing the oil in the car, or buying clothes for the kids, or washing the dishes for the tenth night in a row.
That’s caring.
It’s not arguing or making up or going to counseling or turning your life upside down to find the reason you’re unhappy.
That’s marriage.
No.
Love isn’t a thing or feeling or action.
It’s not chance. It’s not fate. It’s not required. It’s not luck.
It’s just not.
It is the thing you control, during all of these moments that it’s not,
It is a decision you must make, every waking moment of your life.
It is a choice you have, in the good when you can’t imagine another way, and the bad when you don’t think you can hold on.
Love is simply a choice!
Choose wisely.
Garden beyond the woods
You
Find a seed, a pretty, sweet and simple seed
Plant it in your garden beyond the woods
Water it with your boundless words
Feed it with the warm glow of your attention
Watch it grow and blossom into something greater than you imagined
It’s roots twisting deep to reach what they need
It’s leaves uncurling in a magical dance of exploration
It’s flowers peppering the air with sweet, fragrant kisses of wonder
You
Find another seed, a different seed, a gorgeous seed
And plant it, also, in your garden beyond the woods
A true beauty, redesigning the plot with its exotic grace
It’s roots delve to new depths, avoiding the other, under your skillful training
It’s leaves, so glossy and bright, an amazing compliment to the delicate softness of the other
It’s gorgeous, young flower, luscious and vibrant, with perfume that intoxicates in its superior seduction
You
Watch your creations, excited and delighted, master of this space that is solely yours
You
Admire and adore your craft, reveling in your ability to control these natural wonders
You
Lovingly create these things for more than this… For more than you…
Your garden, beyond the woods cannot keep you
It overwhelms you
It overcomes you
It destroys you
So, You
Abandon the incredible gifts you created
Run to the woods
Dissolve into distance
Return to your heart
Your garden beyond the woods, so perfect in design
Made to keep each plant in isolation…
But, in your absence, the leaves, stems and vines branch out, searching for you
Instead, they find each other
They find another
They find your truth
They find closure
You
Might wither without the gifts of your passion
But they
Will thrive, free and wild, without your mediation
Yes. They
Will live on, in your garden, beyond the woods, and grow stronger and more incredible than you will ever be.


