Modify

Rainbow in the dark by Mel Douleur

Every thought strangled

Each hope shattered

Wishes cast into a sky

Too bitterly black

To return them

Where is my chanced

Tomorrow

My dream blurred by

The smudges of

Yesterday’s obligations

I know this is not

Forever

Now is just a piece of sand

In the glass of life

But allow me

My moment

Of disappoint

Because

I long for the winds

Of change

To toss the clutter

Aside

To

Modify this life

And give me

Something new

To dream

I will find the rainbow

Which is precisely

Why I need

To focus

On my

Dark

Sky

Advertisements

Selective Focus

Deadly Siren Black & White by temariataje via DeviantArt.com
Deadly Siren Black & White by temariataje via DeviantArt.com

the big picture isn’t
always as important
as it seems
perception can be
narrowed
objection negotiated
because what’s in front
is what’s important
be present in the
present
hold the face of
destiny
and tell him
he is everything
feel the ferocity
of his response
because every man
needs to feel
that
we are the roles we play
he is my Captain
I am his mermaid
an ocean of truth
can’t change
my focus
because the future
is just us
alone in our ship
and even if
he is wrapped around
my finger
I am wrapped
around
his bow

Higher

Blue Sunset 17: Sunray WP by richardxthripp via DeviantArt.com
Blue Sunset 17: Sunray WP by richardxthripp via DeviantArt.com

Holding onto the wrungs
this never-ending
climb
breaks my spirit
be better, do more, get
higher
but who can resist
looking back
down to easier slats
or even below
to solid ground
wear I could run
free
to climb a new ladder
or a mountain
or lie down on the warm
solid earth
instead
the view sometimes makes me
slip
but when I just
look up
into the heavens I
climb without thought
dizzy with the pressure
and heavy with the weight
of what I carry
if I faulter
it is not just me
who will fall
I still long to see
what awaits
at the top
perhaps
there is balance
in the clouds
but maybe
there is just me
staring down at
the life
I forgot to
love
in my haste
to simply
be done

Son

Choosing sand over stardust
Stomping along the weedy shore
Instead of swimming across
Enchanted waters
My hands steady and strong
Even as my spirit shudders
Waivers and quakes
There is no perfection
His liquid stare puzzles
No one is perfect
Momma
But you are not no one
I choose to be stay solid
When my soul begs to be free
To float on the wind
Finding magic at every turn
Not for him
But because of him
Baby turned boy turning
All too quickly
To Man
The muse to my instincts
A child too much like
His mother
With the logic, playfulness
And serene smile
Of his father
He won’t be perfect
Either
But he’ll be
Strong
And Steady
Beautiful in his complexity
Because of us
And this
Our imperfect
World

sleep

Day 230 of 365 Project by GrotesqueDarling13
Day 230 of 365 Project by GrotesqueDarling13 via DeviantArt.com

swollen heavy sleep
silence broken only
by the soft burr of
your breath
the darkness no longer
angry
but softened
by the safe firm
circle
of your will
no monsters disturb
my slumber
no anxious sleeplessness
infects my eyes
I simply close them
now
to find dreams
which play like films
across the clean
calm blankets
of my mind
whispering giddy tales
beneath fairy lights
song notes dancing
across my skin
your hands cup
around everything
to keep the storms from
blowing through
to protect and
warm
to hold me
secure
you’ve got me
and I awaken having
truly slept
my cheeks burning
with life
my body surging
to begin a new day
not furtively
but willfully
still somehow held
safe and peaceful
in your grasp
even as your fingers
fall away
I feel them
throughout the day
shielding me
inflaming me
gifting me with
the bubble
I’d never knew
I always wanted

A Man Called Ove – Book Review

A Man Called Ove by Fredrik Backman

I am not one who writes book reviews. The best reason I can give for that is that I feel stating my opinion is far less important than moving on to the next book. Or writing a story of my own instead.

But then I read the perfect book.

It’s a bestseller already, certainly, doesn’t need my five-star review. So this is more about what the book meant to me. For me.

The book is about a grumpy old man who has lost his wife and job, has no family, and really shouldn’t be likable at all. I can’t really relate to this man, and so when I started reading, I was afraid it would be one of the books I struggle to get through, but then I quickly found myself crying, laughing, and falling in love.

Ove really just wants to die so that he might be with his wife Sonia again. His world without her is empty and meaningless. And so the book goes on to show us their love story, their life story, and his hilariously sad failed attempts at suicide.

The writing is amazing, the kind that creates a movie inside your imagination. There are some slow spots, but they are deliberate and necessary. And then there are places that pull you through Ove’s life so quickly that you actually feel the unsettling whiplash caused by the whirlwind of events that shape a man into who he is meant to be.

It’s the characters who really make a book. The story is a given, a book is not a book without a story. But the people, pets, monsters, etc. are the key to making a story meaningful and worthy of your time. And Fredrik Backman created the most amazingly diverse but somehow unified group of characters I have ever had the privilege of falling in love with. In the center of them, a man whose calloused gruffness can’t quite hide his sparkling halo.

It was the death, I think, that drew me up and into the story so completely. I am not suicidal, I have plenty to live for, but I have felt what Ove felt. I have known what giving up on a world that you don’t have a purpose in feels like. And I also know what finding your purpose feels like, and how difficult it can be sometimes to hang onto it. How impossible it feels when it changes or disappears.

This book gives the most real, rational and logical description for what it means to get busy living or get busy dying. And to see it there, in black and white, was pretty much the most beautiful thing I’ve ever read in my life.

Love will keep your head above water even when every cell in your body wants to drown. Love is the reason for everything, the meaning of life, and the purpose of this entire existence.

Love can make you turn up when all you want to do is burrow under your blankets. Love can make you stay through the most hurtful, hateful situations. Love can make you walk away and never look back when you know someone is better off without you. Love can mend what it is broken, as long as you give it the chance. Love can be purpose, in and of itself.

I plan to read this book at least a hundred more times in my life, but I won’t sit here and tell you that you will love it. I’m not so arrogant as to believe everyone will like what I like.

I’ll only tell you that this is The Perfect Book. And I hope that if you are looking for the meaning of life, you’ll check it out just to see if you find what I found.

Beauty & Beast

image

you wouldn’t expect the beauty to shine

so brightly in her darkness

it is the beast that burns within her

giving her that intoxicating luminescence

no, you say?

beauty is the light and beast is the dark…

look closer

the beast within us all

pushes us to the edges of our limits

and beyond

the beast within beauty

forces her to seek out the pleasures

that might escape her

the beast

the spirit

the id

makes me, drives him, pulls her

to search through

imagination and knowledge

for the light, peace and magic

that are the truth and meaning of life

if you don’t believe me

watch yourself

as the beast within you hibernates

for when he is at rest

those are the moments when the world turns

without color

when I am

complacent

content

comatose

then

I look inward and whisper

to him, to wake

and when he does

I am alive, once again

I am ferocious

I am vivid

I am

invincible!

 

Photo by Laura Dark, courtesy Facebook. Click to see more of her stunning photography