Engine

Sidewalk by crybabee via DeviantArt.com
Sidewalk by crybabee via DeviantArt.com

The path is mine

Alone

Each slab of concrete

Laid out before me

For me

Each hill, a push toward

Something greater

Every valley

A reward

Unwrapped gifts that promise

Treasures I cannot yet

Imagine

The steps glide forward

Not effortlessly

But purposefully

Unpacking the tightly hewn

Boulder I carry through life

Guilt, worry, fear

Dropped by the edge

Of tomorrow

Until, one morning

I will reach the core

Where grief hides pleasure

Protects it, nurtures it

My Magic

Found again

Burning away

Inside the engine

Of my curves

I feel it

Longing to be discovered

And so

I drive on

Pushing the sunrise ahead

In this thirty minute

Spell

The fire really never left

It was in me

All

Along

Selfish

Love is sometimes selfish
Wants to be seen
Felt
Known
In dark moments
Beneath clouds of regret
And isolation
Love wants to hurt
Because it hurts
In the dark
And silence
But in the light
Set free
On the wind of
Truth
Words
Hope
Love burns brighter
Gleaming
Clean, soft brilliance
My love is
Selfish
But I strive
To shine
Beneath
That
Light

 

No Wait

Wait by jeylina via DeviantArt.com
Wait by jeylina via DeviantArt.com

 

A breath, a moment, the turn of a page

That is the longest you should ever

Have to wait

There is no spell to be broken

No seduction necessary

I am yours

Seconds, minutes, hours

Sewn together into pillows

And whisper soft curtains

Tied off with satin bows

Beneath bright, shining strings

Of dreams

And plans

Glowing with such intensity that

Your fingertips burn

From the longing

Trace the stars into my skin

Kiss that promise

Against my flesh

Mark my body with your will

Your want, your need

Feel me falling over and over and over…

Because Love doesn’t wait

I am yours

In The Story where

I can write only with

My lips, tongue and hunger

I don’t have time for anything else

Just take me

In the sun, on Your bed, in this palace

Of a king…

With the conviction of your purpose

The knowledge that tomorrow

Always comes

And the patience to accept me as I am

Tell me, show me, command me

I am yours

No wait

Dismissal

The midnight hour gleams with the polished hope of a wistful, wishful girl, gazing at stars that would trace the edges of her magic if they could reach her.

But the window is shut and the curtains drawn. The silly dreams of of an immature mind are dismissed by the must-do’s and not-now’s of responsible adults who know better.

A dismissal she will know many times over, even from those who make promises through vows to cherish and through fingertip kisses and even through toe curling bliss.

That loneliness is a requirement, it seems. A right of passage into the realm of grown ups. Where the glitter of the night sky holds only the magic of sleep and where the moon speaks to no one but the wolves.

But you know the secret, don’t you? The sky isn’t where the magic lies.

It’s not in the clouds or the stars or the moon…

It’s right inside each and every one of us.

And the magic in your heart can only be dismissed if you let it.

I refuse your dismissal, cruel world.

I throw back the defeat of your drapes to glimmer, shine and light up all the darkest corners of the universe, right alongside my stars.

There is no goodnight in that magic. There is no dismissing me.

image
http://www.deviantart.com/art/Magic-114340437

Monsters are metaphors

Sweet, calm dreams.
Soft light. Brilliant colors.
Dancing in the rain.
Coloring beneath a blanket
of pale, twinkling stars.
Picnic in the glowing sun.
Dinner with laughter and excitement.
No more nightmares.
No more monsters.
No more.
It is a breath inside an airless room.
To escape those monsters.
Those metaphors.
Haunting me.
In doubt. In fear.
The best kind of therapy.
My monster slayer.
The brave hero of my story.
My patchwork knight.
A fighter for love and truth.
Saving me.
From myself.
Always with me. Never far.
Take the monsters.
Kill the metaphors.
Steal my heart,
Again and again.
The metaphors can’t get me.
As long as you are with me.
You hear me.
You see me.
You know me.
The sweet dreams you give me,
Are my true reality.

My blanket fort

image

Beneath the
Soft swaths of sheets
In the dewy light
Of morning
Your fingers are slaves
To my skin
Your breath is sin
On my flesh
I’m lost in the
Sweet pain
I’m found in the
Unprecedented
Ecstacy
Playful tickles
Turn to joyous
Surrender as
I watch your lips
Roam
Through the language
Of your passion
And then feel them
As they are part of me
On my desperate mouth
On my sensitive skin
On my slick, wanton flesh
Beneath this canopy
Created lovingly
For the girl
Who never grew out
Of such things
You explore the
Woman
Enraptured in
The adventure
She can bring
But beyond exploration
As you bury yourself
Inside my slippery
Sweetness
And my body sings
Our union
Under the blankets
Of our love
It is not that of
Two souls finding
Each other
But that of one
Reuniting
The pleasure builds
Slowly
Then fervently
Until our bodies
Are embattled
In the loving game
Only we
Can create

I need you

Isolation by vpotemkin via DeviantArt.com
Isolation by vpotemkin via DeviantArt.com

Between breaths
When I am broken, raw, and spinning

Between smiles
When I am cut to the quick, not winning

Between moments
When I isolate to sort myself out

Between fixes
When all I want to do is stomp and shout

Between whimpers
When I am just too fucking much for the world

Between heartaches
When I wonder why I can’t just dance and twirl

Between arguments
When I fail to convey the right point

Between looks
When I watch myself disjoint

Between worlds
I am lost, introspective
That is when I need you
Without, I am simply defective.

Hands in my hair

Don't cry, little girl. by laura-makabresku via DeviantArt.com
Don’t cry, little girl. by laura-makabresku via DeviantArt.com

I stand, staring at you.
Punishing you with my eyes.

But I cannot look directly at you, not for long.

My fingers betray me, reaching out to you. To rake softly through that lovely beard. To skim tenderly over those sweet lips. To magnetize you, so desperate to wake the beast within.

So he might fight with me.
So he might frighten me.
So he might fuck me.

You stand motionless. Frozen. Like a dream.

My mind and heart, they’re arguing. Fighting the facts, and memorizing the ache that bears your name. That hurt fuels my magic and beckons me to look up. Look again. Look at you.

I swim in the crystal depth of those pale, sad eyes.

My mind quiets,
My heart stops,
My body lightens…
And I feel

Your hands in my hair.
Where they are meant to be.

Your breath on my skin.
Where it is meant to be.

Your lips on my forehead.
Where they are meant to be.

Your hands.

In my hair.

Where they were meant to be, all along.

The Dark and Light

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“Do you see that spot, that place where the clouds touch the sun?”
“Yes, sweet girl… It’s beautiful.”
“Do you think that is where heaven is?”
“I don’t think heaven has quite such a fixed position.”
“I used to believe things about heaven… about who I might meet there one day.”
“Used to? You don’t anymore?”
“I don’t know. I think my idea of what heaven is has changed.”
“Tell me, little one.”
“Maybe heaven isn’t in the clouds, all white and comfortable… perhaps it’s really in the sun, where our spirits might feed the glow and light up the earth. Maybe heaven is really about fulfilling our destiny, ending our existence with something magical…”
“So, you don’t believe you’ll see your family again? Or friends? Or the loves of your life?”
“Not with my eyes, they are part of my body. I won’t hear them or touch them or get to kiss them…”
“That is sad, baby.”
“No, it is real. The human spirit has so much potential, I can’t imagine wasting it sitting around on clouds all day.”
“You have grown. Such strong ideas. But, what of God? Have you lost your faith?”
“God wouldn’t want us to be trapped within the limitations of our relationships. I think my idea takes Him into account more than yours.”
“Perhaps… Who can say?”
“Not you.”
“No. Not me.”
“I will be a solar flare. My spirit will burn hotter and brighter than many others, and I will be felt in our very atmosphere. My light will shine further than you could even imagine. A spark of magic that will not go unnoticed.”
“And what of me?”
“…Darkness is powerful, too.”
“But not as powerful as light, pretty girl. The dark will always be overtaken by the light.”